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Beer Quotes"I think this would be a good time for a beer."
"He was a wise man who invented beer."
"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer."
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
"And there are few things in this life so revolting as sipped beer. But let it go down your throat 'as suds go down the drain,' and you will quickly realize that this is a true friend, to be admitted to your most secret counsels. Long draughts with an open throat are the secret."
"Of Doctors and medicines we have in plenty more than enough ... what you may, for the Love of God, send is some large quantity of beer."
"Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer."
"I use no porter or cheese in my family, but such as is made in America; both these articles may now be purchased of an excellent quality."
"Beer that is not drunk had missed its vocation."
"A glass of bitter beer or pale ale, taken with the principal meal of the day, does more good and less harm than any medicine the physician can prescribe."
"No soldier can properly fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer."
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with the fools he must come in contact with every day."
"Beer was not made to be moralized about, but to be drunk."
"A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her."
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
"There is nothing which has yet been contributed by man, by which so much happiness is produced as a good tavern or inn."
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?"
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in
the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
"He who has not been at a tavern knows not what a paradise it is."
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend
time with his fools."
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of
mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a
fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with
pizza."
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
"Work is the curse of the drinking class."
"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose."
"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
"There can't be good living where there is not good drinking."
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with fools."
"We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old."
"I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."
"Alright brain, I don't like you and you don't like me, so just get me through this exam so I can go back to killing you slowly with beer."
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